An introduction.

Let me introduce myself. I’m Eva. I’m fierce. I’m decisive. I’m like a robot. I make programs, and stick to them. I’m determined. I set goals for myself. I make the right decisions. I know which way to go. I’m a problem-solver. I have a purpose in life. I want my existence to be remembered. I want to affect people. I see a mountain, and I want to reach the peak. I’m calm. I’m strong. I look people in the eye. I stand with my back straight, hands crossed in front. I glower. I’m also Evana. I’m uncontrollable. I’m all … Continue reading An introduction.

Too sensitive.

Yes, I am too sensitive. Yes, I am too emotional. Yes, I overthink things.   ‘Stop taking things too personally’, they said. ‘You should relax’, they said. ‘Stop thinking so much’, they said.   Well you know what I say?   You’ll never see things the way I see. You’ll never appreciate things the way I appreciate. You’ll never feel as deeply as I do. You’ll never be as passionate as I am. You’ll never love the way I love. You’ll never live the way I live.   So stop telling me how I should be and start thinking about … Continue reading Too sensitive.

Follow the yellow brick road

  Follow the yellow brick road, and don’t look to the left, for the cowardly lion awaits you, his tail between his legs. Away, in the forest he stands, under the safety of a tree, he grasps his shaking body, he fears what he does not see. He wants to make this road seem difficult, more rocky, harder to pass. Don’t let him get his wish, ignore whatever he asks.   Follow the yellow brick road, and don’t look to the right, for the Tin Woodman awaits you, resembling a knight.   Standing near the road, he greets you proudly, … Continue reading Follow the yellow brick road

And reality will sink in.

The city around me looks like a ticking time bomb. At any moment, it will explode into pieces and it will burn to ashes and reality will sink in.     The city around me looks like a movie scene in filming. At any moment, these four walls will fall the green screen will go green again and reality will sink in.     And I will finally wake up from this dream I’ve been living in and reality will sink in. Continue reading And reality will sink in.

Sadness is a funny feeling.

Sadness is a funny feeling. Sometimes you don’t even know where it comes from. You look for the cause and you end up blaming things that aren’t at fault. You’re stuck in a storm you can’t seem to get out of. You’re in a spiral of thoughts which repeat themselves over and over again. And yet these thoughts won’t leave you. And you’re in a dead end. It’s as if you’re seeing through a film that’s distorting everything, things you loved now lose their meaning. Sadness is a funny feeling. Continue reading Sadness is a funny feeling.

For how much longer?

For how much longer will this bubble you’ve been living in keep growing & growing until it bursts into reality?   For how much longer will this bomb keep ticking until all your dreams & hopes explode into your face?   For how much longer will feelings dictate the mind claiming right over reason and leaving no room for discussion?   For it is feelings that fuel the imagination the spark that sets it into ignition that burns away all traces of logic.   Until you lose the earth beneath your feet and reality becomes distorted and all your left … Continue reading For how much longer?