I don’t even know.

I don’t even know what I want anymore. I don’t even know what’s right and what’s wrong anymore. How does anyone even know what they want? How is it determined? Is it something that excites you? That you blindly follow without much thought? Or is it something that contributes to your greater goal? To whatever you’re trying to achieve in life? And how is what’s right and wrong even determined? Is is based on social values? Or is there such thing as right or wrong? And who’s to decide? I don’t know. I don’t even know.   Continue reading I don’t even know.

An introduction.

Let me introduce myself. I’m Eva. I’m fierce. I’m decisive. I’m like a robot. I make programs, and stick to them. I’m determined. I set goals for myself. I make the right decisions. I know which way to go. I’m a problem-solver. I have a purpose in life. I want my existence to be remembered. I want to affect people. I see a mountain, and I want to reach the peak. I’m calm. I’m strong. I look people in the eye. I stand with my back straight, hands crossed in front. I glower. I’m also Evana. I’m uncontrollable. I’m all … Continue reading An introduction.

Here.

  Here, I feel surpressed. Here, I feel I have to pretend. Here, I feel I don’t belong. Here, I feel like like I am underwater, trying to find the surface, but can’t.   I can’t quite breathe. I think I’m drowning.   Here, I feel a constant pressure in my head. That is what I feel now that I am here.       I have to get out of here.         Continue reading Here.

TMI (Too much information) tag

I’d like to thank a person I now consider a friend, Jay, for tagging me on his recent TMI post ­čÖé If you don’t already know about Jay’s blog, please check it out, he offers some of the most genuine poetry out there. His words truly come from the heart. This part gave me the opportunity not only to learn new things about Jay, but throught answering the questions, I got to do some re-evaluation on my own self. I believe I have answered as genuinely as I could, so I hope you enjoy ­čśÇ What are you currently wearing? … Continue reading TMI (Too much information) tag

The Versatile Blogger Award

  First of all, I would like to thank my fellow bloggers, Mairi and Discovering your happiness, for nominating me for this award. Mairi is a blogger who is not afraid to speak of what she feels. Although going through the struggles of middleage, she does not let that become an obstacle and on the contrary turns it into the fuel that fuels her writings. She also discusses other interesting topics, such as emotional intelligence, and benevolent sexism.I absolutely love her strength and the overall willpower she portrays through her writing. Please check out her blog, hitting60.com. Anita, of Discovering … Continue reading The Versatile Blogger Award

Too sensitive.

Yes, I am too sensitive. Yes, I am too emotional. Yes, I overthink things.   ‘Stop taking things too personally’, they said. ‘You should relax’, they said. ‘Stop thinking so much’, they said.   Well you know what I say?   You’ll never see things the way I see. You’ll never appreciate things the way I appreciate. You’ll never feel as deeply as I do. You’ll never be as passionate as I am. You’ll never love the way I love. You’ll never live the way I live.   So stop telling me how I should be and start thinking about … Continue reading Too sensitive.

Follow the yellow brick road

  Follow the yellow brick road, and don’t look to the left, for the cowardly lion awaits you, his tail between his legs. Away, in the forest he stands, under the safety of a tree, he grasps his shaking body, he fears what he does not see. He wants to make this road seem difficult, more rocky, harder to pass. Don’t let him get his wish, ignore whatever he asks.   Follow the yellow brick road, and don’t look to the right, for the Tin Woodman awaits you, resembling a knight.   Standing near the road, he greets you proudly, … Continue reading Follow the yellow brick road