Confidence is funny.

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Confidence.

Confidence is something we’ve always been striving to achieve. It’s an ultimate goal. It’s simple: If we’re confident, we’re happy. But really, what is confidence? Is confidence happiness? Are confident people always happy? Can someone unconfident be happy? And most importantly, is there such a thing as being too confident? These are the questions I’ve been struggling with lately.

You see, a series of events occurred lately which “lifted my confidence”. But really, is that how it’s supposed to be? Shouldn’t confidence be impartial towards the events that occur in your life?

Because in that case, then if negative events occur, then the confidence should go away, and I don’t think that that’s how confidence is supposed to work.

I think confidence isn’t about getting a lot of compliments and reassurance, but it’s about believing in yourself, no matter what others might have to say.

People with true confidence are ultimately happy people, since their confidence does not depend on other people’s opinions. They recognize that they don’t need other peoples reassurance, since a compliment or an insult means nothing more than one persons opinion, and may not always reflect the truth.

Unfortunately, I believe many people today perceive confidence as an acquired attribute, achieved only by others peoples acceptance.  I believe social media has a lot to do with this, since your only as good as the likes you get. Constantly depending on other people for reassurement cannot be considered confidence. Because, while getting a compliment lift their spirits, not getting any compliments or getting an insult will just as easily diminish them. People in this category are also influenced by their society’s ideals. For example, they might envy a certain body type they see on the internet and therefore feel underwhelmed about their own.

I also believe being overly confident belongs in this category. Those who are overly confident are just the victims of too much reassurement from someone in their environment, and unfortunately they haven’t learned to always keep some reservation.

Overall,  truly confident people take both insults and compliments lightly. They think more out of the box, spherically, thinking each situation through, meaning that they earn things from both a good and bad situation. They are constantly reassuring themselves in a healthy and non-narcissistic way and making happiness a personal achievement and not an achievement that can be stolen by other peoples opinions.

Beauty is funny.

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Beauty is funny. Isn’t beauty funny?

It’s funny how beauty works. Basically if you have the gift of “beauty” it means you are rewarded for something that you had no control over, something you have never worked for, something you were just born with due to a random combination on genes which leaded to a “beautiful” face.

But what is beauty really?

Well, the way I see it, its a combination of three things:

  1.  Face Symmetry

From the research I have done, it has to do with face symmetry. Take a look at this next picture:

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Now which face do you find more attractive? Probably the one on the left.

Now take a look at these next few pictures as well:

Notice anything in common? These faces are almost complete symmetric and almost undoubtedly beautiful.

According to a fellow blogger by the name of Claire E. Going, the reason why we find symmetric faces so beautiful is divided to two main categories:

Studies broke it down to two hypothesis, “The Evolutionary Advantage view (which proposes that symmetric individuals are attractive because they are particularly healthy) and the Perceptual Bias view (which proposes that symmetric individuals are attractive because the human visual system can process symmetric stimuli of any kind more easily than it can process asymmetric stimuli).” Scientists have ruled out the Evolutionary Advantage and have settled on the Perceptual Bias view because it is easier for humans to process things that are equal and similar.”

  • Link to Claire E. Going’s original post: https://sites.psu.edu/siowfa15/2015/11/16/the-science-of-attraction-what-makes-us-beautiful/

2. Cultural / Social beliefs

It is a common fact that our perception of beauty has changed throughout the years. For example, in ancient Greece there was a time when a woman was considered beautiful with an eyebrow. A video that depicts this fact perfectly is the one below:

 

But even today, you can see how beauty differs from place to place. In Africa, there is a tradition where women wear neck rings as a form of jewelry:

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All these facts just go to show how relative beauty is and how much a waste of time it is to be hurt that you may not fit into today’s standards of beauty. Maybe you are just in the wrong area or the wrong period of time.

3. Personality

This is my favorite contributor of them all. Personality. I believe inner beauty often governs the outer beauty as well. It has happened many time to myself that someone seems more beautiful to me the more I get to know them and the more I see what a great person they are.

Unfortunately, I feel like this reason has become less and less focused on these days. In an era of social media, where external beauty is praised an worshiped I feel like more and more people are falling into the trap of trying to achieve an ideal external appearance rather than trying to achieve a healthy and vivid personality. With so many celebrity role models portraying an unhealthy, fake way of life where fake eyelashes, breasts and hair extensions are a necessity to move forward, I hope that guys and girls will see through this and realize there’s more to life than just a pretty face.

Hate is funny.

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So for all you university or college students out there you all know that it’s that time of the year. The exam time of the year.

So yeah it’s been pretty tough, but thankfully I have found a nice coping method by going out to study cafeterias and buying all sorts of treats in order to convince myself to study. Hey. You gotta do what you gotta do.

But in the midst of such an important time, possibly a landmark in history, I believe the topic of exams is minuscule. The new president of the U.S.A. has made a very controversial decision bringing a clash once again to the american people and not only.

This video gave me an idea of the situation all the way from Greece.

Another thing this video gave me is an idea of the peoples reaction to this decision, from the comments below. Let me explain.

For starters, I don’t want to take sides, that’s not why I’m bringing this up. I’m not here to convince your towards one side of the other. To be quite honest, I get both sides.

Now I know what you’re thinking. As soon as I say something like that, anger may be starting to pop up. Oh, how dare she agree on keeping Muslims outside the boarder. Or, how dare she believes bringing possible terrorists in is a good idea.

See, that exact anger is what I want to emphasize in today’s blog.

I know it may seem difficult, and I know it may seem absurd, but like they say, the best way to defeat your enemy is to get to know them better. Now paint a picture for me. Imagine you’re having a conversation with someone who believes closing the boarders was a good idea while you believe otherwise. You’re immediate response often might be anger, disgust, depreciation. But imagine if that person you are having a conversation with may have lost a loved one from a terrorist attack. It changes the picture, doesn’t it?

Now imagine the opposite, that you agree on closing the boarders. Imagine all the hard working Muslim families already in the U.S. with family members abroad who can now not visit them because of the this ban. I actually happened to have Indian neighbors back when I was living in the U.S.A. We were best friends back then.I can only imagine how they may feel in a time like this.

In conclusion, all I’m trying to say is I believe things would be a lot better if every person in turn at least tried to show compassion to people with opposite believes. Even if that person doesn’t show compassion back, be compassionate about the fact that that person can’t show compassion back. Maybe he doesn’t know any better.

And if this may seem like too difficult a task, try this video about how to love anyone:

“A person who truly understands love could love anyone. True love isn’t specific in in its target, it doesn’t fixate on particular qualities, it’s open to all of humanity. Even, and in a way especially, it’s less appealing examples.”

Boredom is funny

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Boredom is funny.

Why? Because sometimes you work and work all for the dream that one day you will be able to sit at home and do nothing at all.

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But then, when you get the chance to do so, this feeling comes creeping up, the feeling of boredom.

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So what is boredom and why do we feel it?

Well, according to one of my favorite Youtubers, Vsauce:

” It’s believed to be an emotion that’s a less intense form of discuss. A visual representation of emotions developed by Robert Plutchik shows them all on a wheel:

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[…] Boredom pushes us away from low stimulus situations because variety and stimulation literally lead to neurogenesis, brain cell growth. We are here today doing what we do because boredom has guided us toward greater and greater challenges and bigger and more complex brains.”

So boredom is basically the feeling you get when you’re brain’s telling you you aren’t doing enough.

But that makes me wonder, why is it that some people are more prone to others? Meaning, why is it that some people are perfectly fine with spending days and weeks doing pretty much nothing while others have issues letting just hours pass idly by? Does it have to do with brain chemistry, meaning our DNA? Does it have to do with the way you have been raised and taught by your surroundings? Or does it have to do with the anxiety some people feel compared to others?

Let me explain the last one. Personally, I rarely feel bored. But that’s because I’m rarely sitting around doing nothing. I am a driven and frankly a quite anxious person which means that even when I’m sitting around I will be worrying about things I might be able to do in the time that I’m wasting. I don’t know if you consider this a good thing or a bad thing, but personally it is something I am working on since I believe nothing should be done in a compulsive order. But more on that in another post.

Of course, there is also the boredom that you get even when you’re doing something. For me, when this keeps reoccurring, its definitely time you change your habits.

So yeah folks, boredom is funny.

  • References: Vsauce’s 1st episode of Mind Field called isolation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqKdEhx-dD4&t=669s

being lonely’s funny

Being lonely’s funny.

(And I don’t mean lonely just in a romantic sense, I mean it in a general sense)

It’s funny how it’s not exactly sadness, it’s something different, something you can tell is different.

It’s funny how as independent as you may think you are, loneliness can hit you in the middle of nowhere when you’re completely unexpected.

People are surrounded by others all the time, yet society has made it that many of our encounters are typical and short in order to keep the cogwheels in the machines turning. People approach other people only for a certain purpose and seldom do they truly care about each other.

So its no wonder that you may at some point end up feeling lonely.

But it’s also funny how temporary loneliness is. You feel it one moment, then you speak to a friend, and the loneliness is gone.

Which proves something important: Loneliness is a product of our own imagination. Something I have learned lately is that our minds are great at making scary scenarios. So I believe loneliness falls into the same category. Our minds make it as if we’re stranded on a deserted island with no one around. Well there are people around, and all you have to do is open your eyes and look.

So yeah, being lonely’s funny.

New segment!

A new segment on the blog is coming ladies and gentleman!

It’s going to be called: ” ____’s funny”.

Each time the blank will be filled with a different word, either an emotion, an action,  or pretty much anything you can imagine.

For example, I have already made a post called “Love’s funny”.

In these post’s I will be analyzing the word of choice, picking out its best and worst attributes, and overall, demoralizing its power by understanding it better!

In other words, “____’s funny” will be an effort to understand complicated and mysterious behavior people go through, like love, loneliness, sadness, hatred, in a almost poetic way.

So stay tuned!

 

love’s funny.

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Loves funny. Isn’t love funny? Loves funny.

You can control anything you want in this life when it comes to yourself. You have almost complete freedom over you. You control how you walk, how you speak, how you decide to spend your time, how you think (sometimes with practice), and even your emotions.

But love? Noooo. Love doesn’t obey to rules. You can’t choose who you love. You can’t decide to like someone. You can’t decide to not like someone. Even when you know it’s right. Even when you know it’s wrong.

I mean, sure, there may be certain traits you admire that become a pattern among the people you love, but that doesn’t mean you can predict love.

And then when you do love someone. You become this mushy gushy silly replica of the person you once were. Suddenly whenever you see this person, your heart beat rises, your hands get sweaty, as if you’ve suddenly faced a grizzly bear. Then talking to the person? A disaster. The sentences you say don’t make sense, the jokes you try to make aren’t funny, what happened to you?

Then you’re beating yourself up for acting like a total idiot in front of the person you love.

Loves funny.